VICTORY 2004: PRESIDENT’S ACCEPTANCE SPEECH INVITING THE 55 MILLION AMERICA-HATERS WHO VOTED AGAINST GOD TO BEND OVER AND TAKE IT LIKE A PRISON BITCH
When will Bush Unite the country? When Bin Laden Becomes an Evangelical Christian.
Did I say I didn’t like Bush?
Billionaires for Bush Hail Bush Victory and Look Forward to “4 More Wars” Celebrate Disappearance of over 1 Million Votes
17 Reasons Not to Slit Your Wrists
Richie Bush in Last Laugh
A message from White House West
A quick reminder to people in Ohio, the crooked voting machines are due back to Florida by Friday.” –David Letterman
“If you want to have gay sex or visit a library, it’s probably your last night to do those things … Personally I’ll be killing two birds with one stone.” –”Daily Show” correspondent Ed Helms, on the Bush mandate
“The president is focusing on his agenda for the next three years. One: finishing the war in Iraq. Two: starting the war in three other places.” –Ed Helms
“Conservatives are very happy about the Bush victory. When Bill O’Reilly heard about it, he said, I haven’t been as excited as this since, well, you know.” –Conan O’Brien
“President Bush was really sweating this, because he knew if Kerry won, he’s probably make Bush go to Iraq and finish his National Guard service.” –Jay Leno
“Well, I guess we’ve got four more years to capture bin Laden. No hurry now.” –Jay Leno