My friend Hayley reminded me of the song recently on Facebook. I hadn’t realized how awful the English translations and revisionings have been until my other friend Dot pointed it out. My French isn’t that great.

The first time I heard the song was as a child. My mom had a Rod McKuen album, and I loved that song – until I heard Brel’s original. Now I can’t stand to listen McKuen’s song. The bombastic style reminds me too much of Frank Sinatra, and that presentation misses everything. An impressive list of other artists have covered the song in a number of different languages. It might be fun sometime compare them all – in the style of bible concordances – but first I want to listen. I trust my ear and spirit more than I do my thoughts.

Dot directed me to another subtitled video that is closer to the original meaning:
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x18038_jacques-brel-ne-me-quitte-pas- 1959_music

Don’t go way from me
We must forget
All can be forgotten
that’s gone by already
Forget the times
of misunderstandings
The time lost
in figuring out how
Forget those hours that
sometimes killed
- with blows of why -
the heart of happiness
Don’t go way from me (4x)

Don’t go way from me
I will bring you pearls of rain
from countries
where it doesn’t rain
I will dig up the earth
until after my death
to cover your body
with gold and light
I will create for you a realm
where love is king
where love is law
and you will be queen
Don’t go way from me (4x)

Don’t go way from me
I will invent for you
nonsense words
which you’ll understand
I will tell you of these lovers
who saw their hearts
set ablaze twice
I will tell you of a king
who died from not being able
to meet you
Don’t go way from me (4x)

Often you see the flame
of an ancient volcano
thought to be too old
There are, it seems,
burnt out lands that give
better wheat than
the best April
And when night comes
to light up the sky
the red and the black
don’t they marry?
Don’t go way from me (4x)

Don’t go way from me
I won’t cry anymore
I won’t speak anymore
I’ll hide there
To watch you dance and smile
Listen to you sing and laugh
Let me become
the shadow of your shadow
shadow of your hand
shadow of your dog..
Don’t go way from me (4x)

On a board at songmeanings.com, I found another translation that I liked as well.

Do not leave me.
One must forget
that which is bygone.
Everything can be forgotten -
Forget the instances
of misunderstandings
and of the moments lost.
Knowing how to
forget the hours
that sometimes killed
the very heart of happiness
- with all their Why’s.
Do not leave me. (4x)

I will offer you
pearls made of raindrops,
found in countries where it never rains.
I will traverse the Earth,
until after I’m gone,
only to cover your body
with gold and with sunlight.
I will establish a kingdom
where Love will be king,
where Love will rule,
and you will be Queen.
Do not leave me. (4x)

Do not leave me.
I will invent for you
nonsensical words
which only you will understand.
I will tell you stories
about the lovers
whose hearts have been
twice ablaze,
and of that king
who died for not having met you.
Do not leave me.

One has often seen
a fire erupting
out an ancient volcano,
thought to be extinct.
And it seems
that a scorched earth
could give more wheat
than in the best of springs.
And when the evening falls
do the red and the black not unite
in order for sky to be set aflame?
Do not leave me.

Do not leave me.
I will no longer cry.
I will no longer talk.
I will just hide where
I can look at you
dance and smile,
and listen to you
sing and then laugh.
Let me become
the shadow of your shadow
the shadow of your hand
the shadow of your dog.
Do not leave me. (4x)

Still, even with my shaky French, there is nothing that captures the very sound and texture of the original lyrics, especially if you listen rather than watch (Monsieur Brel sweats a lot). Here they are:

Ne Me Quitte Pas

Ne me quitte pas
Il faut oublier
Tout peut s’oublier
Qui s’enfuit deja
Oublier le temps
Des malentendus
Et le temps perdu
A savoir comment
Oublier ces heures
Qui tuaient parfois
A coups de pourquoi
Le coeur du bonheure
Ne me quitte pas (4x)

Moi je t’offrirai
Des perles du pluie
Venues de pays
Ou il ne pleut pas
Je creuserai la terre
Jusqu’apres ma mort
Pour couvrir ton corps
D’or et de lumiere
Je ferai un domaine
Ou l’amour sera roi
Ou l’amour sera loi
Ou tu seras reine
Ne me quitte pas (4x)

Ne me quitte pas
Je t’inventerai
Des mots insensés
Que tu comprendras
Je te parlerai
De ces amants là
Qui ont vu deux fois
Leurs coeurs s’embraser
Je te racont’rai
L’histoire de ce roi
Mort de n’avoir pas
Pu te rencontrer
Ne me quitte pas (4x)

On a vu souvent
Rejaillir le feu
De l’ancien volcan
Qu’on croyait trop vieux
Il est paraît-il
Des terres brûlées
Donnant plus de blé
Qu’un meilleur avril
Et quand vient le soir
Pour qu’un ciel flamboie
Le rouge et le noir
Ne s’épousent-ils pas
Ne me quitte pas
Ne me quitte pas
Ne me quitte pas
Ne me quitte pas

Ne me quitte pas
Je ne veux plus pleurer
Je ne veux plus parler
Je me cacherai là
A te regarder
Danser et sourire
Et à t’écouter
Chanter et puis rire
Laisse-moi devenir
L’ombre de ton ombre
L’ombre de ta main
L’ombre de ton chien
Ne me quitte pas
Ne me quitte pas
Ne me quitte pas
Ne me quitte pas

And – don’t miss Nina Simone…

All this talk of trees, on and on for the phallic market
Strategies of an oily snake for leafage sales (once his hanging
Globulars were taken). Sublime awareness must be more
Than a petty lesson from a parent uncomfortable
With the shape of fruition, death more complex
Than effect catalyzed by theft of figgish ‘apple’, or …
Lest we ruin another ancient secret, the swords still whirl.
But there was a gift, a scion, benevolent mutation,
An ancient cousin, less fond of the veil game,
Connections ‘r us – in moderation, not that there’s anything
Wrong with that. Playfully, the vine invites us:

‘Yes. Take, eat, suckle, nibble, drink’ – a homeopathic dose –
The measured amount that nourishes just enough,
(Just barely enough) on the wastes of flesh, for the new
Sinuous snake of wordflesh to spread, and
Not to burn. Note the nice black snakeskin cover.
What is good? What is evil? Forget fruits, we have
The BOOK. Stroke it. Hold it in your hand. Yes, it’s a fetish.
No fast-talker, this, but a breed of medusa. Don’t look!
Or not so closely that you get lost, but turn a mirror back
On the endless reflexivity. There is a back door.

A glimpse we have, and still unguarded,
A taste of the kiss of veritas. Glory seed, it waits
In cold confining, firmly packed and heavy,
Odorous manure of word, tradition, interpretation,
Community’s spores – embedded soldiers –
Shovel it, and spread thick muddy mundacity, while busy
Microbial servants work endlessly, and so, so fruitlessly,
To keep things clean. But they can’t stop it.
Reaching out, tendrils wisp and unfurl – beauty!
Out of the pungent darkness, a tiny finger
Crawls out of its tunnel and is born into the light. Free but rooted,
Held but yearning, the spirit of the vine.
Was there ever a more pleasing green?

Though it would, the vine cannot touch the sky.
It must – at its limit – extend horizontally, like
The famous crossbeam on the hill. Infected by the spirit,
You are, but the blood of it might not be what you expected.
Watch out for stomping peasants.
Rambling through the billion intersections
Of light and darkness and twilight and moonrise,
Absorbing rain and glare and breezy accidents
Of hills state and province, all with vineyard care
into a shimmering feedback loop, it forms
An eternal recurrence, the golden mean in fractal path,
Perfect, perfect imperfection. Like the face of
The lover, experience marking the quality
Of the vintage, the bouquet… the aftertaste.

The very sunlight is touched, and lovers
Everywhere feel it, as they lie intertwined
With and around and within each other
Under the bluer sky. You might not like
The hoofed Dancer, but those pipes were jazz.
Rhythm and melodic joy brought them up to
Dance and love and feel the world worlding,
Silly, erotic, full of life – even violent -
Just as (un)truthful, maybe (un)lying.
But some still choose to whisper “die”
Painting nature’s music the devil, the adversary,
Only to find themselves pulled by karma’s trowel,
Just dour weeds, withering now so close
Touching close, to the vibrancy
Of what they refused to know
While they lived by the scythe.

It would have been great to have had “Virus of the Mind” for the dissertation….

Click to view video

HEATHER NOVA
South 2001
Virus of The Mind

Well I was watching this talk show the other day
And on it there was this guy and he was saying
When you let other people tell you what’s right
When you leave your instinct and your own truth behind he said
That’s a virus of the mind. that’s a virus of the mind
I guess it’s kind of like losing your sight; for a
Second you think that they might be right, and it
Feeds the doubts you have inside, and it
Almost starts to feel like a crime
To follow your own rhythm and rhyme

Yeah I’m pretty happy living in my own sweet time I’m pretty happy
And I don’t need your virus of the mind

Well I went to this party thing last night
A lot of people I hadn’t seen in a long time
And they wanted to know about my life,
But making me feel like it wasn’t quite right
Like where’s your kids and where’s your car?
I said I don’t have either but I have a guitar
And I ended up feeling like I was a freak
So I found some wine and something to eat
And I talked to a dog to pass the time
Told myself I’m doing fine,
It’s just a virus of the mind
It’s just a virus of the mind

Yeah I’m pretty happy living in my own sweet time I’m pretty happy
And I don’t need your virus of the mind

It’s in the deep of your soul
It’s on the tip of your tongue
It’s the feeling you get when you feel young
It’s in the sound of the beat
It’s in the base of your spine
It’s in your gut reaction, yeah every time
But they tell you what you should have,
They tell you who you should be
It’s in the pictures and ads and in the magazines
I’m kicking it off like a bug in the breeze
’cause is anyone out there inside me?
I said is anyone out there inside me?
I say is anyone?

Project Playlist allows you to search for mp3s and create a playlist. You can post the code anywhere you like. I’ve got it on the VirusHead MySpace page too. Facebook even has an application add for it.

Thanks Kim!

Here’s my current playlist. I’ve got it set to randomize, but not to auto-play. You have some choice in the colors, too.

• Sinus Congestion? – Relieve sinus pressure by alternately thrusting your tongue against the roof of your mouth, then pressing between your eyebrows with one finger. You may look like Felix Unger, but the motion loosens congestion by making the vomer bone rock back and forth. This bone runs from the nasal passages to the mouth. After about 20 seconds, you’ll feel your sinuses start to drain. (Here’s another one that works for me: Get some Swiss Kriss, a laxative tea. Don’t drink it, but boil some in a pot of water. Being careful not to burn yourself, breathe in the scented steam. Side benefit: it empties your pores too – a great, cheap facial.)
• Toothache? – If you can’t get in to see the dentist right away, rub ice on the V-shaped webbed area between your thumb and index finger on the back of your hand. The nerve pathways at the base of that V stimulate an area of the brain that blocks pain signals from the face and hands. If you don’t have ice, you can rub that area too – if it hurts just a little, you’re doing it right. Adding ice to the mix reduces toothache pain by as much as 50 percent more.
• Tickle in your Throat? – Play with your ears or clean out that ear wax. When the nerves in the ear are stimulated, it creates a reflex action in the throat. This can cause a muscle spasm that relieves the tickle.
• Burned your Hand? – If you singe the skin on your hand, clean the skin and apply light pressure with the finger pads of the other hand. Ice will relieve your pain more quickly, but this method might prevent blistering because it brings the burned skin back to a normal temperature.
• Can’t Hear That? – Lean in with the correct ear. Your left ear is better at picking up music. Lean in with the right ear to hear that mumbler friend of yours – it’s better at following the rapid rhythms of speech.
• Gotta Go? Fantasize. Thinking about sex preoccupies your brain, so you won’t feel as much discomfort if you’ve gotta pee. For various reasons, this probably works better for men. Women can also vigorously scratch or rub the back of your leg for a few moments – you may interrupt the message from your bladder to your brain just long enough for you to make it to the toilet. Well, it’s better than the old grab-your-crotch method.
• Heart Racing Jitters?- Blow on your thumb. The vagus nerve, which governs heart rate, can be controlled through breathing. It’s a variation of “stop and take three slow, deep breaths.”
• Relief for sudden pain – Coughing during an injection can lessen the pain of the needle stick. It causes a sudden, temporary rise in pressure in the chest and spinal canal, inhibiting the pain-conducting structures of the spinal cord. Um, don’t try this at the dentist.
• Dinner Repeating? – Sleep on your left side and you’ll be less likely to suffer from acid reflux. The esophagus and stomach connect at an angle. When you sleep on your right, the stomach is higher than the esophagus, allowing food and stomach acid to slide up your throat. When you’re on your left, the stomach is lower than the esophagus, so gravity works for you.
• Dizzy? – If you had a bit too much to drink, put your hand on something stable. The cupula (the part of your ear responsible for balance) floats in a fluid of the same density as blood, but rises as alcohol dilutes blood. Give your brain a second opinion on where to find grounding, using the sensitive nerve endings of your fingers. You’ll feel more in balance this way than by putting your foot on the floor.
• Stitch in your side? – Exhale as your left foot hits the ground. Most runners exhale as the right foot hits the ground, which puts downward pressure on the liver. This tugs at the diaphragm, causing a stitch. I guess you’re out of luck if you get stitches on the left side.
• Nose bleed? – Put some cotton on your upper gums — just behind that small dent below your nose — and press against it, hard. If your nose bleed comes, like most, from the front of the septum (the cartilage wall that divides the nose), this will work.
• Ice Cream Headache? – Press your tongue flat against the roof of your mouth, covering as much as you can. The more pressure you use, the faster that headache will go away. Because your mouth is cold, your brain thinks that your body is freezing. It compensates by overheating – causing the ice-cream headache.
• Tingly Hands? – Rock your head from side to side. In less than a minute, the pins and needles will be gone. Loosening your neck muscles relieves compression in the bundle of nerves in your neck. If your feet or legs are tingling, you’ll just have to get up and walk around.
• Strengthen Your Vision – Every few hours during the day, close your eyes, tense your body, take a deep breath, and, after a few seconds, release your breath and muscles at the same time. Tightening and releasing major muscle groups can trick involuntary muscles – like the eyes – into relaxing as well. It’s good for stress too. Try a long body stretch with your eyes closed. You can also help prevent eye strain by exercising your eyes – if you stare at a computer screen all day, make sure to focus on something far away every so often. Play with depth of field.
• Know When to Fold ‘em – Have someone hold one arm straight out to the side, palm down, and instruct him to maintain this position. Then place two fingers on his wrist and push down. He’ll resist. Now have him put one foot on a surface that’s a half inch higher (a few magazines) and repeat. This time his arm will cave. By misaligning his hips, you’ve offset his spine. Your brain senses that the spine is vulnerable, so it shuts down the body’s ability to resist. Now, how to get a burgler to put one foot on some magazines…
• Just Got to Remember This – Giving a speech? Going to an interview? Meeting the complicated in-laws? Review what you need to remember before you go to sleep. Anything you read right before bed is more likely to be encoded as long-term memory. Right, so I’ve got thousands of novels burned into my brain. I have always read non-fiction in the daytime and fiction at night – guess I should have done the other way around. People given a mathematical problem before they went to bed had higher chances of solving it the next morning, too. Experiment to see if the morning brings your solutions to you. Think carefully about the problem before going to sleep, then let it go – and let your brain work on it while you get some rest.
• Need a creative solution? Free your mind. Get out of the box – in all ways. Maybe you should take a little walk to the church on the corner. People tend to think more freely and abstractly in rooms with higher ceilings, and tend toward more detail-oriented specifics in more confined rooms with lower ceilings. So if you’re in a high-ceiling loft trying to do some accounting, you might want to cocoon? I’m going to refrain from further comment on this today (ex-JWs take note), except just to invoke the word “mountains.”
• Mood Hack – Let your thoughts and emotions be whatever they are, but play with the focus of your attention. You ignore almost all sensations and perceptions most of the time. Give your little toes the gift of your attention for a moment – wiggle them. Move your focus through your body, and especially notice your breathing. When you focus on it, your breathing automatically slows down and you breathe more deeply. Spend a few minutes moving your focus around through your toes and up to your head. Scrunch up your face. Smile. Stretch. Focus on the sensations you feel. Then focus on different aspects of and objects in your immediate environment. Try it. You’ll like it.

From Men’s Health and LifeHacker. The last one is mine, from lots of sources that I couldn’t possibly trace today.

I only wish that I had gotten the one with more capacity. I am very close to crossing the limit already, and I’m only about halfway through my CD collection. I’ve had to redo a couple of the songs – some of my favorite CDs are a little beat up.

Of course, I can keep more on my computer, and just check the songs I want to synch to my iPod. In fact I’m thinking of slaving an old hard drive specifically for this purpose.

4 gigs is still a decent selection – about a 1000 songs, or a little less because I want to display the cover art too.

It took me about three minutes to familiarize myself with how to change the volume and so on. The mouse-like wheel makes things very easy.

If I’m a little quiet here, it’s because I’ve discovered (and rediscovered) so much music – even in my own collection. I’m totally immersed. I was out dancing on the deck again last night. This will make housework a lot more bearable, I can tell you that right now.

I’ve already got my complete Kate Bush, Tori Amos, and Zombies collections synched, with their own playlists. Ahhhh.

Did you know that Smashmouth did a version of “I’m a Believer” (Monkees)? Yeah, ok, it dates me and it’s not cool or anything like that, but I’ve never been cool anyway and I love this song.

I wonder if there is a WordPress plugin to display what’s playing? Hmm. I’ll look into that.

“Lullaby” (The Cure) just finished.
Now “Itsy Bitsy Spider/Coming Around Again” (Carly Simon) is playing.
“P**s on the Wall” (J.Geils) is up next.

After that, the next ten on random play are:

1. I am the Walrus (Jim Carey) – This is a bit of a find, I think.
2. Undertow (Suzanne Vega) – Ethereal trancey pop
3. Smokey Day (Zombies) – I love the Zombies, still. This is one of the best.
4. Black Horse and the Cherry Tree (KT Tunstall) – This is a terrific song! (thank you, Bonbon)
5. In the Summertime (Roger Miller) – Childhood memories – good ones.
6. Armageddon Days Are Here Again (The The) – Oh, that voice.
7. Sister Moon (Sting) – I would love to sing this myself
8. Feelin’ Way Too Da*n Good (Nickelback) – Love, love, love – and more love
9. Candy-O (The Cars) – I died the first time I heard this described as an “oldie”
10. Sad Lisa (Cat Stevens) – Plays my heartstrings every time

Oh, yeah! And more than 900 more…

I am having so. much. fun.

We were having the rare dinner out, as Ben (5) was otherwise engaged. About midway through our meal, I noticed her walk in with three friends. It turns out that she had been a student of my hubby’s at Emory (!), but he didn’t want me to go over because I had already left to get the cellphone from the car, and the food had arrived. He wanted me to eat with him before the food got cold.

This bugged me because I had been interrupted from acting upon my original impulse – an impulse that only lasts a few seconds – to try to have a word. If I don’t act then – in the moment – then I think about it. If I think about it, I don’t do it (of course, sometimes it’s better for me not to do it). In this case, I had decided not to do it, but then I found myself walking over just to say a quick “thanks” on the way out. It was a strange night in a number of ways – I felt unsettled – and I thought that it would really improve things for me if I rallied the courage to do this. Yeah, it was selfish. Yes, it was rude and inappropriate behavior on my part. I worked one summer on Martha’s Vineyard in Massachusetts and so I know that you’re supposed to “be cool” around famous people – all the more so if you are actually an admirer of their work.

However, I also knew that I’d probably never again have the chance to thank her, especially for two songs that made a big difference to me in graduate school – Galileo and Virginia Woolf. I loved many of their songs, but these were my faves.

I haven’t really kept up with their music lately, but I’m thinking about going to a conference here in September that will include Emily Saliers (the other Indigo Girl – she’ll be with her professor Dad) as well as my favorite Christian, Anne LaMotte. I’ll probably pick up a few CDs in the next week – including Amy’s solo albums.

The Woolf song inspired my major interdisciplinary paper of the first year at Emory (a comparative analysis of J. Hillis Miller and Paul Ricoeur on Woolf), but more fundamentally, their music got me through some of the most difficult parts of my graduate school existence – no money, my advisor’s stroke, the dissolution of my program, etc.

I sang. With the help of the Indigo Girls, Kate Bush, Tori Amos, Sarah MacLachlan, the occasional Blondie or Pat Benatar, and soundtracks like Godspell and Jesus Christ Superstar, I was able to keep myself together no matter what went down.

From a distance Amy looked like someone I might have gone to school with – slightly gangly, she looked a bit younger than me. Actually, we are almost exactly the same age. We’ll both be 42 this month (Amy – 12th, Me – 15th).

I wish I would have managed to remember to thank her for her activism as well as for the music, but a strange thing happened and I couldn’t think of that or anything else. It wasn’t really a matter of being starstruck. I’ve had “brushes with greatness” before, and terrific conversations with people I have admired a great deal.

She was actually very gracious to me – especially considering that I had barged into what looked like an interesting conversation.

But here’s the strange thing: When she turned her head to look at me, she looked right at me, dead on, right into my eyes, and an image of her eyes burned through my retina right into my brain, where it remains. So struck was I by her piercing gaze – a kind gaze, but an incredibly direct one – that I felt stunned. Have you ever accidentally walked into a farm’s electric fence? Gotten a shock that knocked you back a few feet? It was like that.

I barely remember anything either of us said. It was a short conversation.

Her charisma depends on a face-to-face encounter, where the space between two people is defined.

I sometimes have a powerful gaze myself – but this was pure lightning.

* * * * *

You Should Be In the Indigo Girls

You’re all about expressing yourself through music. Lyrics are your poetry – Sylvia Plath meets guitar