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Month: June 2006

White House Switchboard

White House Switchboard

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Political comedy email making the rounds…

“Thank you for calling the White House switchboard. Our new voice activated system will help direct you to the proper office.”

“If you are calling to complain about the mishandling of the war in Iraq, press one.”

“If you are calling to complain about the abuse of prisoners and the White House’s endorsement of torture, press two, and then say the name of the torture site that you wish to complain about (and please note for the sake of the voice mail system that it is pronounced Abu GRABE, not Abu grahb).”

“If you are calling to complain about illegal spying on American citizens and the abuse of FISA laws, press 3, but do know that these calls will be recorded.”

“If you are calling to complain about the disastrous mismanagement of the hurricane Katrina recovery, please press 4, and your call will be directed to the Federal Emergency Management Agency. If you wait for more than 48 hours without anyone picking up the phone, hang-up and send a letter. We have been assured that all letters will receive a prompt reply within one year.”

“If you are calling regarding the administration’s unwillingness to enforce immigration law, press cinco, por favor, or direct any thanks to your local chamber of commerce office, which can explain why we like cheap labor that can’t vote and where you may be able to find willing illegal day laborers in your local area.”

“If you are Jack Abramoff or any Saudi prince, please call the private line * it is always open.”

“If you are calling about the Medicare prescription debacle, please press 6. If you are having a medical emergency, you should proceed directly to your local emergency room, although please understand that your health coverage may not pay for the visit and you can no longer get out from under the bill by declaring bankruptcy.”

“If you are calling about the ballooning federal deficit or the recent hike in the debt ceiling to $3 trillion, please press 7, unless you are Bill Clinton calling to brag about the surpluses under your administration, in which case we don’t want to hear about it.”

“If you are calling to complain about the White House’s efforts to block stem cell research, please press 8, and then say the disease that you are most concerned about that may ultimately be cured through scientific
research. If you are a scientist calling with new research findings or important clinical data, please hang up, we don’t want to hear from you.”

“If you are calling to express concern about global warming and our efforts to roll back environmental laws, please press 9, unless you are a government scientist, in which case you are forbidden to talk without first clearing it with the oil lobbyist we hired to screen and edit your research. He can be reached at Exxon 4-2611.”

“If you are calling to complain about the President’s efforts to “privatize” social security, please press 1 and then the pound key, and your call will be redirected to representatives at Merrill Lynch, who will explain the
virtues of putting all your savings in the stock market.”

“If you are calling about the need for more prayer in public schools or any other faith-based initiatives, please press 1 and then the star key, and Reverend Falwell will be with you shortly.”

“If you are calling to lobby for more Supreme Court Justices who will block a woman’s right to choose, please stay on the line and the President will be with you immediately.”

“If you are calling about all the tax breaks for the wealthy, press *1 if you have ideas for more loopholes and are making more than a million dollars per year; if you are earning less than a million per year but have ideas for how you may help the wealthy, press *2; if you are earning less than a million per year and just want to complain that all the burden is now falling on you, please call back in a couple of years.”

“If you voted for President Bush and are now concerned that over 12% of the U.S. population now falls below the poverty line while the top 1% has wildly increased their wealth, please understand that we are not laughing AT you.”

“Press zero at any time if you would like to hear these options again.”

“Thank you for calling the White House. It is our pleasure to serve you.”

(Thanks Corinne!)

Religion as a Virus: Dawkins on Religion

Religion as a Virus: Dawkins on Religion

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Richard Dawkins (Oxford prof., father of meme theory, author of The Selfish Gene) argues against irrational, militant religion in the two-part Channel 4 UK documentary “The Root of all Evil?” (Jan. 2006).

Dawkins goes too far by including all forms of faith – not all are in direct contradiction to independent thought and constructive doubt! (Please chime in on this – esp. Progressive Faith Bloggers!)

Still, his arguments are very persuasive in terms of the malignant, dangerous, and destructive forms of “faith” that we see once again today – both here and abroad.

This from the Channel 4 description:

He describes his astonishment that, at the start of the 21st century, religious faith is gaining ground in the face of rational, scientific truth. Science, based on scepticism, investigation and evidence, must continuously test its own concepts and claims. Faith, by definition, defies evidence: it is untested and unshakeable, and is therefore in direct contradiction with science.

In addition, though religions preach morality, peace and hope, in fact, says Dawkins, they bring intolerance, violence and destruction. The growth of extreme fundamentalism in so many religions across the world not only endangers humanity but, he argues, is in conflict with the trend over thousands of years of history for humanity to progress – to become more enlightened and more tolerant.

The Root of All Evil? Part 1 – The God Delusion
The Root of All Evil? Part 2 – The Virus of Faith

Here is Part 1:

The God Who Wasn't There The Selfish Gene : 30th Anniversary Edition--with a new Introduction by the Author The God Delusion

Steaming Mad: Air America in Atlanta is Gone

Steaming Mad: Air America in Atlanta is Gone

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ARGHHHHH! Turned on the radio in the car to my customary 1690 WWAA AM station to hear Air America. BUT NOOOOOOO! Air America in Atlanta is GONE.

J.W. Broadcasting, headed by Joe Weber (as in grills?), purchased the assets of radio station WWAA-AM (Avondale Estates) from Intermart Broadcasting of Georgia for $12 million. Weber has switched over the content of 1160’s programming to 1690, and it now broadcasts from Adel. JW Broadcasting was formed in May 2003 to acquire television stations in small to mid-sized markets. The Company’s initial acquisition was a triopoly in Columbia-Jefferson City, MO (FOX affiliate, ABC affiliate and UPN affiliate).

Much of the AM market here is thick with church stations and conservative talk-show hosts. Even NPR has gone downhill. The only other good station I’ve even heard about is FM 89.3 WRFG (Radio Free Georgia) – but it doesn’t come in for me. It’s supposed to have a progressive news hour at noon, free speech news at four, and Democracy Now at five. I’ve written to them to request that they strengthen their signal and adopt at least some of the Air America content.

It’s just that little extra kick in the face that the company is named “J.W.” Broadcasting.

Yes, I can still listen to AAR online, but I don’t really listen while I’m on the computer. I listen in the car. Now Air America is gone, and I can’t stand the other stations.

ooooooooo, I am so angry.

Unconscious Mutterings 176

Unconscious Mutterings 176

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Unconscious Mutterings

Weekly Unconscious Mutterings Meme – Week 176

I say … and you think … ?

  1. Voice :: Within
  2. Us :: Between
  3. Passionately :: Embrace
  4. Humbly :: Request
  5. Love songs :: Timeless / Silly
  6. Dim :: View
  7. Calendar :: Document
  8. Careless :: Whisper
  9. Block :: Feint
  10. Goal :: Plan
Soundbites

Soundbites

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“You were in Baghdad for six hours. You weren’t even in the real Baghdad. You were in the Green Zone. That’s like going to the Olive Garden and saying you’ve been to Italy.”
— Jon Stewart,
On Bush limiting his Iraq visit to Baghdad’s Green Zone,
Jun. 15, 2006

“That’s his privilege as Vice President. He was tough, demanding, and when he thought I was out of line, he snapped my garters.”
— Colin Powell,
In an interview with AARP magazine, when asked about his advice being ignored by the White House,
Jun. 13, 2006

“Whenever …I see the weapon I invented to defend my motherland in the hands of these bin Ladens I ask myself the same question: How did it get into their hands?”
— Mikhail Kalashnikov,
Russian gun maker who designed the AK-47,
Jun. 12, 2006

“A good PR move to draw attention.”
— Colleen Graffy
US Deputy Assistant Secretary of State for Public Diplomacy, describing the weekend suicides of three detainees at Guantanamo,
Jun. 12, 2006

What greater mockery of the flag?

What greater mockery of the flag?

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In the previous post, I made mention of the language of the sacred. If the government decrees that the flag is sacred, does that violate the separation of church and state?

As may be, it’s actually going to come to a vote in the Senate. We may only be able to sit and watch our government amend the First Amendment to restrict political freedom of expression.

So this seems to be the overall plan – get as much power away from the judicial branch as possible by handing it to Congress and the executive branch. Where Congress isn’t pliant enough, then disempower Congress, and focus on executive power.

The US Supreme Court ruled in 1989 that the First Amendment to the Constitution protected Americans’ right to desecrate the flag as a means of free expression. Interesting – the majority opinion was joined by Scalia.

Back in 1997, Dr. Roger Pilon, Ph.D., J.D broke with colleagues at the libertarian/conservative think tank Cato Institute in his testimony before the Subcommittee on the Judiciary of the House. It’s worth a read – here’s my favorite part:

Sir Winston Churchill captured well that essential feature of our system when he observed in 1945 that “the United States is a land of free speech. Nowhere is speech freer–not even [in England], where we sedulously cultivate it even in its most repulsive forms.” In so observing, Churchill was merely echoing thoughts attributed to Voltaire, that he may disapprove of what you say but would defend to the death your right to say it, and the ironic question of Benjamin Franklin: “Abuses of the freedom of speech ought to be repressed; but to whom are we to commit the power of doing it?”

When so many for so long have understood the principles at issue today, how can this Congress so lightly abandon those principles? It is said by some that the flag is a special case, a unique symbol. That claim may be true, but it does not go to the principle of the matter: in a free society, individuals have a right to express themselves, even in offensive ways. Once we bar such expression, however, Franklin’s question will immediately be upon us. What is more, we will soon find that the flag is not unique, that the Bible and much else will next be in line for special protection.

It is said also that the flag is special because men have fought and died for it. Let me suggest in response that men have fought and died not for the flag but for the principles it represents. People give their lives for principles, not for symbols. When we dishonor those principles, to protect their symbol, we dishonor the men who died to preserve them. That is not a business this Congress should be about. We owe it to those men, men who have made the ultimate sacrifice, to resist the pressures of the moment so that we may preserve the principles of the ages.

After all, free expression and the right to dissent are among the core principles that the American flag is meant to represent. What greater defacement of the flag can there be than to shift its meaning into something that makes a mockery of American values and rights? Freedom of expression is one of the the truest tests of our dedication to the principles that our flag is supposed to represent.

Flag Issue History – Resources

Three countries ban flag-burning – Quick! Who are they?

Iran | China | Cuba