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Last Tickle Test – Gender Identity

Last Tickle Test – Gender Identity

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I usually enjoy taking the tests at Tickle, but this is the last one I’ll do, I think. They have gotten too aggressive with the Focalex ads, requiring several pages of skipping before you can take the test. There’s even an ad when you’re done. Also, they don’t provide html to post the results.

I’m always fascinated by “what counts” as a masculine or feminine “trait.” It’s so culturally driven. And I often disagree.

I’m 53% masculine and 47% feminine.

When we compare your results with other women it shows that you are somewhat more masculine than average. What does it mean for a woman to be masculine? Masculinity in Western culture involves participation in physical activity and strong analytical skills. But masculinity is more than just liking sports and analyzing problems.

Of the four gender types identified (highly masculine, highly feminine, androgynous, sex-role transcendent), I am classified as androgynous:

Androgynous: People who are androgynous have both strong masculine and strong feminine qualities. Androgynous people tend to be both action and people oriented, and are usually able to successfully take on a diverse range of roles that cross gender-role boundaries.

There were interesting charts showing norms for men and women on a variety of qualities (and where I plot on those) but since they were using scripting there really isn’t any way to display those here (at least not without spending WAYYY too much time on it).

Here’s the verbiage, though:

Traditional Masculine Qualities:

Sports Fan: You scored in the mid-range of liking sports compared to other people. You’re physically active, but it’s not an obsession. You may be more of a spectator than a player when it comes to sports. When making choices about how you spend your time, there are occasions when you really want to be active and at other times you’d rather be more sedentary. You may get competitive at times, but it’s not a defining quality.

Decisive: You probably have no trouble making decisions. You’re someone who almost always has your wits about you. You are generally capable of dealing with difficult, high-pressure situations and handling the consequences of your actions. In fact, you may even seek out roles and situations that demand your sharp decision-making skills.

Leader: You are likely to have exceptionally strong leadership abilities. You tend to be a self-confident, goal-focused, trailblazer. Being successful in life is probably one of the most important things to you. You’re not likely to back away from an opportunity to take charge. You may, in fact, seek out settings in which you can play a leadership role.

Aggressive: You tend to be high in aggressiveness. When you’re provoked you’re most likely to respond in attack mode. You may not be the one to escalate a conflict, but you’re likely to return insult for insult and blow for blow. You probably have a very short temper. You tend to be someone who feels strongly about protecting and defending what’s yours, whether that’s property or people.

Analytical: You are highly analytical. Complex thinking and problem solving are activities in which you are likely to engage regularly. You tend to enjoy stretching your mental muscles. When someone asks you an explanatory question, such as “How does that work?” you may be prone to give a more detailed answer than necessary. You are generally drawn to roles and situations in which you can exercise your strong analytical skills.

Principled Individualist: You are unique. You probably feel that you are very much your own person with a strong sense of self, and that there is no one quite like you. You are likely to have a clear sense of right and wrong, and seek to conduct yourself in a way that lives up to your own high standards. You have an internal ethical system and living according to your own rules is what matters most to you. Your approach to life tends to be positive and hopeful.

Traditional Feminine Qualities:

Cheerful: No one is likely to describe you as perky. You can even be a bit cynical or pessimistic. You don’t tend to be someone who simply paints a smile on your face even if you’re feeling down. When you’re happy, you’re happy, and when you’re not, you’re not. Other people who are extremely perky, peppy and sunny may even annoy you.

Compassionate: You are moderately caring and compassionate. You have a warm and tenderhearted side, but you may be more likely to show it to those who are closest to you and not just to everyone. You’re comfortable expressing affection in certain situations. You might be moved to help every person who needs it, but you’re also aware of the practical limitations of trying to fix every wrong in the world. While you sometimes find yourself in care-giving situations, you probably don’t actively seek them out.

Gentle: You are not especially gentle. You tend more toward energy, power and intensity in your demeanor. When you get angry or frustrated, you tend to express it. You’re not likely to want to quickly smooth things over or just turn the other cheek. You may find that quiet, calm, tranquil settings can be boring. Although you’re not opposed to peacefulness, you thrive on a certain amount of stress. You may even pride yourself on being a little rough around the edges.

Understanding: You understand people fairly well. You are able to see things from others’ perspectives and can usually empathize with people’s problems and struggles. You may have some intuition and insight into people’s motivations and goals. It’s likely that you have a friend or two that turn to you when they have problems. You might have toyed with the idea of being a therapist. It’s likely that you find yourself in roles and situations that call upon your skill in understanding people, even if you don’t actively seek these out.

Timid: You are not very timid. In a crowd you tend to stand out. You generally enjoy attention from others and may even seek the spotlight. You’re fairly self-confident and are not easily embarrassed. In a group setting you can usually jump right into the conversation. You can be very social and outgoing. When you first meet someone your self-confidence helps you feel comfortable and you’re probably good at making the other person feel comfortable as well. When you feel strongly about something, whether it’s positive or negative, you tend to have little trouble expressing your feelings.

Trusting: You are not very trusting. When someone tells you something you may require independent verification before you really believe it. You tend to be very good at telling when someone is lying to you, and it is probably rare for someone to deceive you for any length of time. You’re not looking for the worst in people, but you tend to approach life with the belief that things aren’t always exactly the way they appear on the surface. You tend to possess a healthy sense of skepticism.

Tickle Statement:

Tickle’s own research used the established measures of psychology as a starting point and we conducted our own studies to discover what masculinity and femininity mean today. It may be somewhat surprising to learn that society’s beliefs about masculinity and femininity haven’t changed all that much. What has changed is that in current times more people are scoring as androgynous and sex-role transcendent. This area continues to be an active research topic in psychology because gender identity can affect how we think, behave, and communicate.

Since I work for a company that specializes in workforce assessments and strategies, I can’t help but notice that these gender traits might be better described in the neutral language of DISC behavioral styles. For example, the power components (aggressive/timid) are about the use of force, the D quadrant. I’ve seen plenty of High D women and Low D men.

The whole sports thing has nothing to do with gender at all – and they are really talking about all kinds of different things – loyalty to a team and vicarious adrenaline and war games and exercise and health…. A dedicated ballet dancer is then…what?…super masculine?

Some of the categories are really more about prioritizing one’s passions and values – So, a kind compassionate man would be…..super feminine?

And they leave things out, such as communication styles (even though they give examples, such as Deborah Tanner).

On “trusting” – does this mean trusting of people? Which people? All people? Family, friends, strangers, in-group, out-group, authority figures? Does it also include trust with regard to tasks and objects – lower standards with regard to information, products, methods?

This just isn’t a good way to organize. I really wonder about where they got the “norms” too.

So, these things are fun, but I don’t really see that a breakdown in terms of gender makes any sense.

My own opinion is that there are behaviors and values that are socially coded as “masculine” or “feminine.” These break down too – for example, along class lines.

I don’t really think that there is any such thing (not in terms of behavior and personality), as an inherently “gender-specific trait.”

And of course none of this has anything to do with gender “identity,” which is a recent social construct that plays most often in debates and arguments about sexuality, not gender.

Christian Paradox, or, Hypocrisy Incarnated

Christian Paradox, or, Hypocrisy Incarnated

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The Christian Paradox (Harpers.org)

Check out this excellent excerpt from Bill McKibben’s article in the August 2005 edition of Harper’s Magazine.

The basic point is that although the overwhelming majority of Americans profess to be Christian, the USA is the least Christian in its behavior (compared to other “developed” nations).

A few nuggets:

“In 2004, as a share of our economy, we ranked second to last, after Italy, among developed countries in government foreign aid. Per capita we each provide fifteen cents a day in official development assistance to poor countries.”

“nearly 18 percent of American children lived in poverty (compared with, say, 8 percent in Sweden). In fact, by pretty much any measure of caring for the least among us you want to propose—childhood nutrition, infant mortality, access to preschool—we come in nearly last among the rich nations, and often by a wide margin.”

“Despite the Sixth Commandment, we are, of course, the most violent rich nation on earth, with a murder rate four or five times that of our European peers.”

“We have prison populations greater by a factor of six or seven than other rich nations (which at least should give us plenty of opportunity for visiting the prisoners).”

“Having been told to turn the other cheek, we’re the only Western democracy left that executes its citizens, mostly in those states where Christianity is theoretically strongest.”

Usery? Adultery? Deceit? Greed? Envy? Gluttony? Hey, take your pick.

“After all, in the days before his crucifixion, when Jesus summed up his message for his disciples, he said the way you could tell the righteous from the damned was by whether they’d fed the hungry, slaked the thirsty, clothed the naked, welcomed the stranger, and visited the prisoner.”

Think about it. The Christian message is NOT to steal from the poor, or to take water and other natural resources from others, or to abandon the needy, or to hate those who are unlike you or to rally for death. Those things are not Christian, and no manipulation by any false prophet will make it Christian.

God’s spirit and will – at least as it might have been expressed through Jesus, and I can think of some others – is a spirit of compassion, love and forgiveness. None of us are particularly good at living those values that Jesus modelled – but if you base your politics on a Christian viewpoint, you’re not really allowed to claim that the opposite of those values is a Christian moral ground.

I grew up as a hard-core fundamentalist, and later taught religion at the university level. Most students who think they are Christian don’t understand the texts and doctrines of their own religion. They have beliefs that are not a part of the understanding of their own denomination’s teaching, and sometimes not even mentioned in the Bible at all – supposedly the source of their authority. Of course, the bible is a highly selective and edited collection of diverse texts, with a political history of its own – and the idea of its being “inspired” came kind of late in that history.

Still – if you are a Christian, don’t you have to take into some consideration the actual teachings of your messiah? By your teaching, you must believe that you will be judged as you have judged, that you will be forgiven as you have been forgiving, that Jesus will consider all you have done toward the poor, toward the hurting, toward the powerless – as you having done it toward him.

Alas alas for you – hypocrites and Pharisees… making a big show of righteousness and it signifies nothing real at all.

The word repent means turn around. If you have not love (caritas – charity, compassion, caring), you have nothing at all.

2nd Lamentations (Mom’s Bible)

2nd Lamentations (Mom’s Bible)

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I haven’t made a "Mom post" in a while. My friend Jacque sent me this, and it had me laughing. Variations on the theme are posted all over the internet, but I finally found a very similar piece by Ian Frazier, which seems to have been the original source. You can read his original version at the Atlantic Monthly site (The Atlantic Monthly; February 1997; Laws Concerning Food and Drink; Household Principles; Lamentations of the Father; Volume 279, No. 2; pages 89 – 90).

Laws Pertaining to Dessert
For we judge between the plate that is unclean and the plate that is clean, saying first, if the plate is clean, then you shall have dessert.
But of the unclean plate, the laws are these: If you have eaten most of your meat, and two bites of your peas with each bite consisting of not less than three peas each, or in total six peas, eaten where I can see, and you have also eaten enough of your potatoes to fill two forks, both forkfuls eaten where I can see, then you shall have dessert. But if you eat a lesser number of peas, and yet you eat the potatoes, still you shall not have dessert; and if you eat the peas, yet leave the potatoes uneaten, you shall not have dessert, no, not even a small portion thereof.
And if you try to deceive by moving the potatoes or peas around with a fork, that it may appear you have eaten what you have not, you will fall into iniquity. And I will know, and you shall have no dessert.

Laws When at Table
And if you are seated in your high chair, or in a chair such as a greater person might use, keep your legs and feet below you as they were. Neither raise up your knees, nor place your feet upon the table, for that is an abomination to me. Yes, even when you have an interesting bandage to show, your feet upon the table are an abomination, and worthy of rebuke.
Drink your milk as it is given you, neither use on it any utensils, nor fork, nor knife, nor spoon, for that is not what they are for; if you will dip your blocks in the milk, and lick it off, you will be sent away.
When you have drunk, let the empty cup then remain upon the table, and do not bite it upon its edge and by your teeth hold it to your face in order to make noises in it sounding like a duck: for you will be sent away.
When you chew your food, keep your mouth closed until you have swallowed, and do not open it to show your brother or your sister what is within; I say to you, do not so, even if your brother or your sister has done the same to you.
Eat your food only; do not eat that which is not food; neither seize the table between your jaws, nor use the raiment of the table to wipe your lips. I say again to you, do not touch it, but leave it as it is.
And though your stick of carrot does indeed resemble a marker, draw not with it upon the table, even in pretend, for we do not do that, that is why.
And though the pieces of broccoli are very like small trees, do not stand them upright to make a forest, because we do not do that, that is why.
Sit just as I have told you, and do not lean to one side or the other, nor slide down until you are nearly slid away. Heed me; for if you sit like that, your hair will go into the syrup. And now behold, even as I have said, it has come to pass.

On Screaming
Do not scream; for it is as if you scream all the time. If you are given a plate on which two foods you do not wish to touch each other are touching each other, your voice rises up even to the ceiling, while you point to the offense with the finger of your right hand; but I say to you, scream not, only remonstrate gently with the server, that the server may correct the fault. Likewise if you receive a portion of fish from which every piece of herbal seasoning has not been scraped off, and the herbal seasoning is loathsome to you and steeped in vileness, again I say, refrain from screaming. Though the vileness overwhelm you, and cause you a faint unto death, make not that sound from within your throat, neither cover your face, nor press your fingers to your nose. For even not I have made the fish as it should be; behold, I eat it myself, yet do not die.

Laws of Forbidden Places
Of the beasts of the field, and of the fishes of the sea, and of all foods that are acceptable in my sight you may eat, but not in the living room.
Of the hoofed animals, broiled or ground into burgers, you may eat, but not in the living room.
Of the cloven-hoofed animal, plain or with cheese, you may eat, but not in the living room.
Of the cereal grains, of the corn and of the wheat and of the oats, and of all the cereals that are of bright color and unknown provenance you may eat, but not in the living room.
Of quiescently frozen dessert and of all frozen after-meal treats you may eat, but absolutely not in the living room.
Of the juices and other beverages, yes, even of those in sippy-cups, you may drink, but not in the living room, neither may you carry such therein. Indeed, when you reach the place where the living room carpet begins, of any food or beverage there you may not eat, neither may you drink.
But if you are sick, and are lying down and watching something, then may you eat in the living room.

Concerning Face and Hands
Cast your countenance upward to the light, and lift your eyes to the hills, that I may more easily wash you off. For the stains are upon you; even to the very back of your head, there is rice thereon.
And in the breast pocket of your garment, and upon the tie of your shoe, rice and other fragments are distributed in a manner wonderful to see.
Only hold yourself still; hold still, I say. Give each finger in its turn for my examination thereof, and also each thumb. Lo, how iniquitous they appear. What I do is as it must be; and you shall not go hence until I have done.

Various Other Laws, Statutes, and Ordinances
Bite not, lest you be cast into quiet time. Neither drink of your own bath water, nor of the bath water of any kind; nor rub your feet on bread, even if it be in the package; nor rub yourself against cars, not against any building; nor eat sand.
Leave the cat alone, for what has the cat done, that you should so afflict it with tape? And hum not the humming in your nose as I read, nor stand between the light and the book. Indeed, you will drive me to madness. Nor forget what I said about the tape.

Complaints and Lamentations
O my children, you are disobedient. For when I tell you what you must do, you argue and dispute hotly even to the littlest detail; and when I do not accede, you cry out, and hit and kick. Yes, and even sometime do you spit, and shout "stupid-head" and other blasphemies, and hit and kick the wall and the molding thereof when you are sent to the corner.
And though the law teaches that no one shall be sent to the corner for more minutes than he has years of age, yet I would leave you there all day, so mighty am I in anger. But upon being sent to the corner you ask straight-away, "Can I come out?" and I reply, "No, you may not come out." And again you ask, and again I give the same reply. But when you ask again a third time, then you may come out.
Hear me, O my children, for the bills they kill me. I pay and pay again, even to the twelfth time in a year, and yet again they mount higher than before.
For our health, that we may be covered, I give six hundred and twenty talents twelve times in a year; but even this covers not the fifteen hundred deductible for each member of the family within a calendar year. And yet for ordinary visits we still are not covered, nor for many medicines, nor for the teeth within our mouths. Guess not at what rage is in my mind, for surely you cannot know.
For I will come to you at the first of the month and at the fifteenth of the month with the bills and a great whining and moan.
And when the month of taxes comes, I will decry the wrong and unfairness of it, and mourn and rend my receipts.
And you shall remember that I am that I am: before, after, and until you are twenty-one. Hear me then, and avoid me in my wrath, O children of me.